Imagine yourself free to feel whatever emotions come to you without it being a negative experience. You release the hurt of trauma so it no longer prevents you from doing, thinking, and being what you want. You act deliberately on your emotions, fully expressing them without harming others. You confidently and effectively help others with their emotional struggles.

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This can become your reality as you practice the five core principles of this virtue season:

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1. Understand Emotions:

Experience every kind of emotion. Understand the nuances of each one and what triggers them in you. 

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It is important to experience what we think of as “positive” and “negative” emotions. You might perceive this as painful at times but pain makes us more aware of the breadth and depth of our emotional state. You can only experience joy and other "positive emotions" to the degree that you’ve experienced sorrow and other "negative emotions".

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As you grow in mindfulness, you can learn to no longer label emotions as "good" or "bad". You'll stop resisting certain emotions which means they'll no longer be a negative experience. All emotions will become states that come and go like "the changing of the seasons" as described by Alan Watts in this video:

 
 

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> What emotion are you feeling right now? Describe all of its nuances. What triggered your current emotion?

> How have so-called "negative emotions" helped you?

> How do you react to the idea that there are "no wrong feelings"? Why do you react that way?

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2. Correlate Emotions & Physiology:​

Master how your body affects your emotions and how your emotions affect your body.

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For example, your body affects your emotions when hunger makes you more irritable and your emotions affect your body when long-term stress weakens your immune system.

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As you gain a fine-tuned understanding of how your body and your emotions affect each other, you’ll be able to control your emotional and physical health more. You’ll know how to make physical changes to improve your emotional state and make emotional changes to improve your physical state.

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> What memories do you have of your body affecting your emotions or your emotions affecting your body?

> Is there an emotional change you'd like to make? What physical changes can you make to help that emotional change?

> Is there a physical change you'd like make? What emotional changes could help?

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3. Correlate Emotions & Thoughts:​

Master how your emotions affect your thinking and how your thinking affects your emotions.

 

For example, your emotions could affect your thoughts when you try to focus on what's being said in a meeting after getting emotional news. Your thoughts could affect your emotions if thinking about a particular person or event instantly changes your mood.

 

As with Correlating Emotion & Physiology, as you master how your thoughts and your emotions affect each other, you’ll be more in control of what happens inside you. You can learn to choose what to think about in order to control your emotions and know what emotional state you need to be in to apply your mind to specific things you want to do.

 

> What experience do you have with thoughts and emotions affecting one another?

> How could you use this principle of Correlating Emotions and Thoughts to grow in the ways you want to grow or improve your abilities?

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4. Express Emotions:​

Honestly express your emotions.  Do not hide or exaggerate them.

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Trying to suppress or avoid undesirable emotions does not help. If you want to let go of these emotions, you have to go on the journey of fully expressing them in some way. When you're expressing these emotions, try to do it in a way that doesn't harm anyone else (see the next Core Principle).

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On the flip side, express your desirable emotions as well! Many people are afraid to express happiness, love, and other desirable feelings because of embarrassment or fear that these feelings won't last.

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The next time you feel good, do a happy dance, smile big, be creative, or tell someone how great things are!

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> What emotion have you been holding in that it would be good for you to express?

> How will you express it without harming yourself or others?

 

5. Act on Emotions Intentionally:​

Act on your emotions in a strategized way that allows you to stay in control of yourself, avoid hurting yourself or others, and stay strong in all 13 virtues.

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The resources section of this page is full of specific techniques to act intentionally on your emotions.

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There may be times when you're feel moved by emotions like love and compassion to help someone but you are reluctant to do so. Acting on Emotion Intentionally includes serving others when we feel to. The more you act on these transcendent feelings, you more you'll feel them. The more you ignore them, the less you're feel them.

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> When have you acted on an emotion in a way that harmed you or someone else? What did you do to make things better? Is there more you could do?

> How can acting on emotions unintentionally make it hard to apply each of the other virtues?

> What safeguards can you put in place to help yourself act intentionally on emotions in the future? How will you fully express your emotions with these safeguards in place?